Pharma, BioPharma

Life Science Limericks: 2015 Edition

Up next: Digital health ditties? Biotech ballads? Payer/provider paeans?

The life sciences biz had a colorful year. We were on the sidelines of scandal (Shkreli), disillusionment (Theranos) and some extreme M&A. As such, the internet’s awash with year-end highlight reels – rattling off the top stories, top personalities and top issues of 2015.

But what’s the fun in that?

We do life sciences a little differently here at MedCity News. So here are some 2015 life science highlights… in rhyme!

An ambassador of health going tech
With that cool, Jobs-esque black turtleneck
But her diagnostics face scorn
Dubbed a failed unicorn
Liz Holmes: Now a bit of a wreck?

We must thank our dudebro Shkreli
Pharma’s bungling Machiavelli
He jacked up drug prices
Threw Wall Street in crisis
But revealed its corrupt underbelly!

presented by

All hail CRISPR/Cas9
The gene editing uses? Divine.
But we must be prudent:
Can’t engineer a mutant.
“We’ve gone Gattaca!” the masses will whine.

This year’s M&A perversion?
Botox and Viagra, merged for inversion
Pfizer’s under attacks
But… Allergan’s tax!
Might sanction that U.S. desertion.

As for stethoscopes, Topol is critical
‘Cause he espouses all things going digital:
The renowned cardiologist
Is a social technologist
His prowess on Twitter? Inimitable.

I signed up for 23andMe
To learn what my genetics could be.
All I found? Hypochondria!
Over my mitochondria
Oh, and that lame family tree.

There once was a biochemist called Venter
Who became a genomics inventor
Now he backs precision med
‘Cause he’s afraid to be dead
Hence the launch of his “Human Longevity” center

Google favors the literary sobriquet:
Verb Surgical, Verily and Alphabet
But though they like words
They’re just biotech nerds
Chasing healthcare like it’s the next Internet.

“The forgotten organ” we’ve found
Where a world of bacteria abound
Microbiota’s got plethora
Of good-for-you gut flora
(“Fecal transplant” still has a gross sound)